i run from hate, i run from prejudice, i run from pessimists

“Wow, I’m really good at lying to myself.”

– Katherine Bacher

Oh dear.

I may have made some serious miscalculations for myself. As with most people, I’m afraid I haven’t quite stuck to my guns with my New Year’s Resolutions. Hopefully those of you out on the Interwebs have fared far better than I.

Precious Readers, I have failed you. Which is worse than failing myself. Although they’re only separated by a 1/8 tick. I feel worse about disappointing you than lying to myself. Let’s face it, lying to ourselves always makes one feel better in the short-term. Earning your disappointment or disapproval… yikes.

Not as an excuse, but to give you an idea of where my head is at, the following has occurred in the last four months:

1.  I got roped into a MAJOR PROJECT at work that required almost 100% of my attention. This included many late nights, long hours, time away from Pilot, etc. Let’s just say the entire month is a caffeine-and-carb-riddled blur of a mess where I managed to single-handedly complete a massive shipping of product generated from my job out to the masses of our clients all over the nation. I think there was a grand total of maybe 5 hours worth of conversation and eye contact spent with Pilot in that entire month. Combined.  So thankful February isn’t a “real” month.  That might just have de-wired my brain.

2.  A co-worker passed away. Due to the nature of this individual’s situation, the family he left behind, and the infamous way he created notoriety for himself before departing from this earth, I will not go into further details. Unfortunately he leaves a young child behind, and although I empathize with that child, I did luck out in having significantly more years with my own father before he passed.

3.  A dear, dear friend of mine – we’ll call her Azalea* – passed away. Her service is still being scheduled for next month. I worked with her at my previous employment and we became very good friends. She suffered from colon cancer for the last 3 years of her life, multiple bouts of chemo and radiation. When I last spoke to her, she was on an oxygen tank. She was a wife, mother, grandmother and my friend.

Azalea’s passing earlier this April has really hit me hard, and I’m ashamed to say I had quite a few meltdowns at home last week.

Let’s face it. I’ll probably have a few more.

She was more than just a co-worker to me. She was family. It brought up old feelings of losing my dad and grandma (both of whom I lost in 2007), all over again. Feelings of which I buried super, super deeply.

I hate stuff resurfacing like that. It’s like a bad carpet stain. You think it’s out of the way. When you least expect it, it pops right up again clear as day and you wonder how the hell all of the efforts you put into “out of sight, out of mind,” it’s always right below where you can see it. Lurking.

That’s right. Lurking. I’m beefing up on my verbs today.

For those of you who don’t know, I’m approaching the big 30 this year. Maybe it’s a mid-mid-life crisis, but these recent events made me realize I need to start making a LOT of changes in my life.

Foremost in my mind: Stop living to please other people.

My dear, Precious Readers, you are in the presence of a wuss. A big-

Well, not “big.” I’m not huge or anything. I’m… well… let’s just say there’s a lot to love. I have pretty wrists, decent-sized boobs for an Asian, and good hair, does that count?

-what was I saying? Oh, right.

I’m a cowardly, shy, “flight”-reactive wuss when it comes to going for my dreams.

Growing up, most of my life was pretty much planned out for me. I wasn’t a “rebel”-

Although, my parents have mentioned that I had quite the smart mouth. Maybe “smart mouth” + writer’s brain go hand-in-hand?

-I was a good girl. I ate my vegetables, brushed my (good) hair, minded my P’s and Q’s. Fared decently in school, didn’t get into trouble. Heck, I volunteered countless hours at children’s day camps, retirement homes and nursing homes.

From the womb to the tomb.

I’ve spent my whole life trying to perfect a lifestyle to meet others’ idea of success and accomplishment. To be brutally honest, leaving my last job and starting this blog are probably some of the most rebellious things I’ve ever done.

Although, I am a roller coaster junkie. Is that rebellious?

These recent events have made me ask some tough questions. Like, “Why am I so afraid?” I need to start living for me before the next 30 go by like the wind. I’ve spent a large portion of my 20’s depressed, and I think it’s mostly due to the fact at my incredible ability to deflect and ignore what’s actually important to me.

The reason? It’s simple, my Precious Readers. Fear.

It’s not difficult to figure out. Seriously. It’s 100% Fear.

Fear of disappointing those I love.

Fear of failure.

Feeling unworthy/undeserving of my true dreams; that my parents are right, and “an artsy job” will not pay the bills and I’ll end up homeless.

Although I’d never sell my laptop. There’s free wi-fi everywhere. I’d make do. I can’t live without access to my books (and yes, I have TONS of real books, too), cat videos and online cooking channels. YouTube** and Kindle** are my late-night best friends.

I’m sure most of those who are in my Daily Life and Real Life will tell me I’m crazy.

Well… crazier.

I don’t care anymore.

I’m sick of caring about what people tell me to care about.

I want to care about the things that keep circling around in my head over and over, to which I respond with the word “someday.” I’m tired of “someday.”

Someday can kiss my ass. It’s already kicked it for 30 years.

It may take me a while to accomplish my bucket list life goals, but I have faith that God will give me the strength to truly move forward, stop being afraid about what other people think.

Also, that He’ll boot me on the butt when I’m getting lazy about it, ensuring I at least try with everything that I have.

I hope this post encourages you to go after what you think your purpose is.

It’s too short, people. Life is just too damn short.

*This name has been changed to protect the privacy of the individual and their family.

**Not endorsed by YouTube or Kindle. Any statements made about these two applications are the opinion of my own free will and not a reflection of those company’s points of view.

auld lang syne, the good old days, and all that jazz

Every day above ground is a good day. Period.
– Gene Simmons quoting his mother, a Holocaust survivor

I’m thankful for every morning I wake up.

Sexy Man God – I mean, Brad Pitt: You scared?

Matt Damon: You suicidal?

SMG Brad: Only in the morning. 

(As quoted from Ocean’s Eleven.)

Ok, so it’s really about 50/50, but that’s better than zero.

All kidding aside-

Well, for the next paragraph at least.

It’s a new year, and I have a new sense of purpose.  Precious Readers, I hope you haven’t felt abandoned.  Contrary to the idea, I’ve thought more about this blog during my hiatus than when I first began.

I’ve been at the New Job for almost a year now.  Time has gone by incredibly fast.  t keep.  For those who follow me on Facebook, you may have already seen this list.

For those who don’t… Why not?  Go ahead and find me on Facebook and let’s be friends!

2013 Results

  1. Still thankful for Pilot
  2. Nimitz joined the family

We got a new pup, named him Nimitz:

Nimitz - 2013 - 01 02

He’s very sleepy in this photo, as you can tell by the clock saying it’s almost 1:00am.

3.   No health issues
4.   New job
5.   Old friends/New friends, and even hosted some movie nights
6.   Broke the birthday curse
7.   Met some of my all-time favorite authors and even got to close out the year as a Beta Reader for one of them
8.   Hockey, Hockey, Hockey
9.   Learned a bunch of new recipes
10. Managed to take days off here and there for relaxation

2014 Resolutions

  1. Will make time to keep up with my blog again, at least once a month, and update the format

That’s right!  Yours truly will be giving the ol’ blog a facelift, Joan Rivers style!  When will it happen?  You’ll have to stay tuned!

2.   Finish writing a second and third booCompile a list of literary agents
3.   Finish 1 painting a month

What?  I write. I sing. I paint.  I’m a regular, Korean-born-German-by-association-American Renaissance woman!

4.   Visit loved ones far away at least twice
5.   Save up for my first, full 2-week (or more) vacation and TAKE ONE!
6.   Get Nimitz to stop freaking out at other people
7.   Hockey, Hockey, Hockey
8.   Make at least 10 loaves of bread with new bread maker

We got a breadmaker and am LOVING IT.  With as many sandwiches Pilot eats, it was a worthwhile investment.

9.   Read at least 100 books

I know, I know. Not much of a goal when I go through books like a machete through red tape!

10.   Find a way to start saving for a down payment on a permanent residence.

Who has two thumbs and is looking to put down some roots?
<points at self with thumbs>
This gal!

As always, I’m grateful.  Grateful to have been blessed to experience the past, and have been blessed with the ability to plan a future!  A very special shout out to my amazing and supportive hubby, Pilot!  Without his undying support of me, I am merely a shell of a human being.

HAPPY NEW YEAR PRECIOUS READERS!
LOVE AND HUGS TO YOU AND YOURS!
WOOT FOR 2014!

What are your resolutions and what are you grateful for?  Love starting out the year with joy and hope!

i might be great tomorrow, but hopeless yesterday

“Everyone thinks of changing the world, but no one thinks of changing himself.”
– Leo Tolstoy

Can people really change?

I know, I know. This is a loaded question. But everyone has different theories on this – myself included.

From what I’ve witnessed over my years of existence-

No. Not quite that many, thank you very much.

-I find the answer a little bit of both “Yes” and “No.”

Typical psycho-babble response, of course. Thank you, Dr. Freud.

As mentioned in previous blogs, I am adopted.  Therefore, I do believe in Nurture far more than Nature.  I am my mother’s and father’s daughter.  I have great cooking skills, a probably-a-little-too-generous-to-help-than-is-good-for-me-and-gets-me-into-trouble inkling to help others, and a hot temper from my mother.  Sarcasm, dry wit, love of science fiction and superheroes, and tends to laugh at the drop of a pin from my father.

However, I am also my own person and horrible at math, a pretty good singer and can handle a 5-star heat dinner instead of my family who eat mild (maybe medium on a stronger day) than the rest of my family which is very different from my parents.

Have my experiences and life trials affected how I approach the world? Yes.

Is my approach to problem-solving, the way I connect patterns and human behavior, and my hot-temper completely different than when I was a child?  Hmm… Probably not.

Over and over again I witness family and friends exhibit the same behavior.  Sure, life’s experiences may have slowed down their same initial response to the situation, but that first flare of natural instinct (whatever it is to them), does happen.  It takes their brain to squash the initial reaction and switch to what has been proven to work – against their initial natural response.

As all of us do, I have people in my life who make some less-than-great life choices. Every time I think they’ve changed, it comes up again and that inkling of hope that maybe they’ve changed gets blown to bits.

We’re not talking about, “Oh, I wish they didn’t stay at that job,” “Wouldn’t they be happier with someone else in their life?”, or “Why would you want to move there?” types of questions people who are in each others lives ask about when our family/friend picks something that sounds outrageous to us.

No.  I’m talking about really bad decisions that endanger their lives and sometimes others. Maybe they picked up drugs or alcohol (or both) again. Maybe they decided to stick with a physically or emotionally (or both) abusive relationship.  Not being able to let go of the past that completely incapacitates their ability to function as a human being – Like have the energy to get out of bed laying there for weeks, or leave their house for the first time in a month.  I recognize that depression is a cycle and that life is hard.  Everyone’s level of depression is different, but it’s still depression.

It’s also tough to help someone who doesn’t want it.

A few years ago after some really tough times in our lives, Pilot and I decided to make changes. This decision was propelled by our tumor scares last year.

Life is so short, and I find it going by faster each year. It’s not a realization – I’ve known that since I was a child.  I have a very large case of thanataphobia.  Yes, I’m a Christian* and I believe (and hope) through my faith in Him that I end up in heaven after my life ends…  But it doesn’t mean I have to like the fact that we’re all in one big waiting room and we’ll all end up somewhere – sometimes by a painful, violent, or (God forbid) hilarious event.

Morbid enough for you?  Again, serious thanataphobia and fear of all the many, many ways the end result will happen.

I’ll probably die some violently, hilarious way.  Like standing on the sidewalk and nailed by a bus mirror.  Or fall off the first rung of ladder.  Or hit by a coconut someplace tropical.  Felled by a tree.  Or slip on the ice and eaten by wild penguins.  Or snap my neck on the counter edge while an electric mixer is still whirring! in my hand in the kitchen.  Or by a hunter while I’m taking a stroll in unknown forestry. Or the worst nightmare of all…

Elvis-style.

On the toilet.

Yeesh!

Dear God, please. PLEASE!  Do not let me die on the toilet!

<grumbles to self> My death is so going to end up on YouTube, I know it.

In a nutshell, I believe people at their basic core functions as a being do not change.

Their approaches to problem solving, how they understand the world, and emotional stability during their most stressed will always stay the same.

That being said, the only time I think a person truly changes is due to a major event that alters the direction of said person’s life.

Read as, found spiritual enlightenment, lost spiritual enlightenment, a traumatic event, etc.

Outside of a major nuclear blast to one’s perspective of the world, I think things stay relatively the same.

What do you think, Precious Readers?   Would love to know what you believe on this topic.

*Katherine Bacher’s Philosophy on Christianity:

To clarify, because so much of the population uses the term “Christian” very loosely, figured I should explain.  Especially since this is on the oh-so-private-Internet.

I believe in the Holy Trinity (God, Son of God, and the Holy Spirit), that Jesus Christ is our Savior, and in the 10 commandments.  I believe that our immortal souls are saved through faith, and faith alone.  Yes, works are great – it’s always good to help your fellow man because you want to, not because you have to, but I believe it’s your personal faith in Him that is the core thing.

I believe that Churches are for people, not for God. Church is for people who want Christian fellowship.  I have not yet found a church that is 100% welcoming of non-Christians and judgment free of non-Christians.  Therefore, I don’t go.  It’s a good idea – great reference for answering questions.  Great for already-Christians… Non-Christians – Well… that depends on the church.

I will attend a church when one presents itself capable of the above things.  Sorry folks, not a churchgoer.

Reading the Bible is good.  But again, reading the Bible is about knowledge and education. It helps solidify your faith when you have a question.  It’s a great idea and I highly recommended it if you’re confused and/or want to learn more.  However, not required.

Faith people.  Keep up the Faith.

I also believe that God is a loving God who loves ALL – whether not white, white, male, female, rich, poor, suburbanites, straight, gay, bi, transsexual, transgender, or whatever.

Ok, and I guess even them… the government. Fine! Ok. Even the government.

I’m also a firm believer in not shoving my faith down other people’s throats. God is a God of love and I live by example – not by yelling at people. It’s not my place to judge – that’s God’s role.  If we judge “on His behalf” (and I use that phrase VERY LOOSELY) then that is putting us in God’s role.  Placing ourselves in God’s role is egotistical, presenting quite a resemblance to dictatorship, and wrong.

Thanks for listening, but I digress. To continue from the footnote, please scroll back up the blog.

taking care of business and working overtime! well… not anymore…

Television is not real life. In real life, people actually have to leave the coffee shop and go to jobs.

– Bill Gates

So…

I quit my job.

That’s right Precious Readers! I. Quit. My Job. But, I got another one.

Gotcha, didn’t I?

After approximately 11 years at my previous employer’s (7 years at that particular department) an opportunity that was almost too good to be true popped up. It’s a perfect fit blending everything I’ve learned (even my Copy Editing skills from college) and putting them to WORK.

If you haven’t noticed, I haven’t written much. Now you kind of know why.

After I went on a vacation, I had an interview at the New Place pop up. Do you have any idea what it’s like to go on vacation and then decide to quit your current job the day one is supposed to be returning from vacation?

I was a complete wreck. I lost sleep. Couldn’t eat. I felt sick and had terrible headaches. Worried all of the time…

But, wait a minute… Isn’t that what I was happening while working at said job? Isn’t that why I had gone on vacation in the first place? I had so much vacation time built up that I could easily have taken a week off and had plenty of vacation hours leftover.

Let’s take a look at vacations for a minute:

Pilot and I took an Alaska cruise for 7 days in July 2012.

That was the only vacation I had taken in 3 YEARS.

There’s something not quite right about that.

I reviewed the last 7 years. Even from the beginning there were late nights. We’re not talking about a 1-2 hours beyond normal work times. We’re talking about 4-5 additional hours each night.

Overworked, underpaid, stressed out, no personal life anymore. I was miserable all of the time. Add in the stress of a husband who decided to go back to school, and I was stuck. Completely stuck. Now I know this makes it look like I’m complaining about Pilot going back to school. But I am proud of him. I was happy to support both of us while he figured out what he wanted to do in life. At the time, I still didn’t have a clue for myself of the direction I was going in. So what’s the difference whether I was to stay where I was or get a new job?

Now that our married life has stabilized a bit, it gave me a LOT of time to think about what I wanted. I still didn’t have an iota. Sure, I knew I still wanted to be a writer, but that was an ambition I kept pushing down due to long years of conditioning being told I should do anything other than writing- or art-related.

Then I started this blog. Writing for this blog helped me tune into a large piece of myself that had been locked away for a very long time. Once I started writing for myself-

Sorry Precious Readers. As much as I love all of you and appreciate your support, this blog was started for selfish reasons. It wasn’t to share information to the world, it was about writing again, and practicing writing every day. The fact that I’ve gained a following – again a very hearty THANK YOU to each and every one of you! – is fortuitous and a luxurious bonus to writing here.

– I began thinking of other areas of my life that I had locked away. What about ambition? I really don’t have any ambition. As talented as I am at office work, working at a desk everyday is usually not what any child thinks about when they dream of their future.

Hi, I’m Katie and I have immaculate charting, data entry and collating skills. Have you seen my filing system creation ability? Whoo hoo!

But then I started thinking about my ultimate goal of being a full-time writer? How would I get there? How do I make that transition in my life without bankrupting Pilot and I and ending up in a refrigerator box?

Although, if I did have to live in a refrigerator box, I would pick one of those fancy ones with the French doors – the kind you have to shorten your countertop space just to make the thing fit. It would be the condos of refrigerator living!

Then, it happened.

An author I greatly admire, Ann Charles*, did it. She actually did it.

She had published enough work and made enough sales to be able to quit her job and write at home full time.

I have never been so inspired and green-eyed-jealous in my life.

Ann Charles* is actually a Washington local and writes hilarious mystery romance novels. You’ve seen me note her work on my Goodreads lists.

I started thinking about work/life balance. Sure I was working and making a paycheck, but did my current lifestyle meet my personal needs as a writer? Did it give me the time with my friends and family like I wanted? Were my bills getting met in a way that didn’t leave me scrounging for change in my couch cushions to buy food?

After taking some time to see if the theory of work/life balance existed for me, the answer was quite obvious.

I don’t have it.

I have work… But, I have no life.

Something needs to change.

I need to change.

What Ann Charles has? I want that. I want it a lot.

It was decided right then and there that I needed to not make it a goal to just “find a new job.” I needed to find a job that gave me my life back.

My friend Obi-One-Pin-Obi (see earlier posts to learn more about her) had a position open at her company. I jumped at the chance-

Because let’s face it. The economy sucks.

-and guess what? The company liked me so much they called me the same day to offer me the position! They encourage a work/life balance.

No. Scratch that.

They encourage Work/Life Effectiveness. The CEO is a nationally-ranked Scrabble champion. The HR Director is a nightly stand-up comedian. The former CIO is a nationally-known golfer.

Seriously.

I don’t have to hide the fact that I’m an aspiring writer or the genre. They don’t care. They encourage it.

What is this mysterious spell they have on themselves? Oh, right. Happy employees.

Well, how do you like that? It turns out all of those years of no raises, not title change or anything at my old job – it wasn’t me. It was you.

After saying “Yes” to the opportunity (and pay, I might add) it’s been a whirlwind of adjustment and changes. I’ve been at the New Job for 3 full weeks it’s only getting better! The people are nice and the environment is good.

The thing that has probably changed the most is my approach to the job. I was able to start fresh and re-establish myself and my habits at a new place where no one (except my friend, Obi, of course) knew me. I can establish new ground of how this was going to affect me and my life. I refuse to let this one get the best of me. They will get my best work efforts, but I get to leave it on my desk and come home without a thought elsewhere.

I haven’t written Precious Readers, and please forgive me for not doing so, because I have been spending the last month prepping to leave and start work. I won’t go into the details, but let’s just say my ‘exit interview,’ if you can call it that, basically listed what my job description said versus the list of work I was actually doing. They didn’t match and my actual work greatly outweighed the job description.

My former co-workers were a little taken aback at how much I did for that office. I think it was something they all knew I did in the background, but I don’t quite believe it ever sunk in the sheer volume of work that I handled while employed there.

I think they realized they were a little screwed until the next person was hired to take my place.

After looking at the actual list up and down, the Higher Ups at my former employer’s realized the job description needed some (drastic) updating and the pay to increase.

Am I angry?

No. I have a new job that pays well.

Am I annoyed? Meh… I plead the Fifth on that one.

After a few frank discussions with Pilot-

Ok, maybe I did a mini-interview with him.

-I asked what changes he’s noticed in me and our lives since starting the new job.

His reply?

He noticed I was sleeping more, I was happier, had more energy and wasn’t stressed out.

He also noted I was treating him and others nicely.

Not “nicer.” Nicely. Hmm…

After a loving swat on the arm and an additional hour’s conversation about what exactly he meant about the “nicely” comment, we agreed that life has definitely changed for the better.

I come home and actually feel like I have time to enjoy the evening before bedtime. I get to spend time with Pilot before going to sleep. We actually have time to do things together instead of me waving a wistful hand in his general direction with a watery smile saying goodnight before crashing for the evening.

The most amazing change and piece I look forward to in the near-future? After three weeks of transition, I feel ready to write again. Not just for you Precious Readers, but also for myself. I’m finding myself inspired again and thinking of new ways to torture my characters. Plot points are falling into place. I’m reading a lot again.

Also known as: the voices are back. Just kidding! (Mostly.)

I’m very excited at this new phase. I’m

I see myself working at this new company while having the ability to come home and write. This company even encourages it. This job has given me 2 gifts:

Time and Energy

I come home after a long day ending it with a feeling of accomplishment and fulfillment. This last week as I’ve been transitioning from Trainee to actual Employee, I’ve been feeling like I can come home to fulfill my life’s purpose.

This New Job has given me the time and energy to write again. I couldn’t ask for a more precious gift. This job is another step in the direction of being a 100% full-time writer. Maybe not today. Maybe not tomorrow. Maybe not until 5 or 6 published works. But someday. This job created the opportunity for me to even hope for a Someday.

Not really a point to this one. Only that I now understand why God slammed doors in my face or drop-kicked me out of some opportunities. He waited for this perfect opportunity to present itself to give me my turn.

Well Precious Readers, that’s all I have to say for now. I’ve been given back the hope of my, “Someday” and I don’t intend to waste it by sitting on my ass.

Books don’t write themselves, you know.

*The above post is 100% of my own, personal opinion and is not connected nor endorsed by Ann Charles.

“of course i talk to myself. sometimes i need expert advice.” – unknown

“Words mean more than what is set down on paper.

It takes the human voice to infuse them with deeper meaning.”

– Maya Angelou

Hello everyone, and welcome to a special “radio” edition of Katherine Bacher’s Bits and Pieces blog!

Boy, that Unknown dude sure has said quite a ton of stuff over the centuries, haven’t they?

Today’s blog post is brought to you by Dragon speech software by Nuance, Home Version 11. You may be surprised to find that I actually broke down and bought this program. Well Precious Readers, I thought about my recent wrist issues and how it was worth investing in the program to assist with my writing. By purchasing speech software instead of destroying my wrist for the, 50 years my life, I’d like to think that I’m more investing in my future versus being really, really, really lazy.

Speaking of speech software, I think today’s post would be appropriate to approach the subject:

Audio Books vs. Hard Copy Books

Looking at the Internet, this is a topic with heated discussions and very strong opinions. It only takes one quick search to find this is quite the raging battle.

Remember the Audio- Uh… I mean… Alamo!

Well folks, in my opinion, I love them!

They make great entertainment, and the best part is no commercials! If I’m riding along inside Grease Lightning on a drive to Portland, Oregon, I can enjoy being introduced to a new character who just might change my soul a little bit while my Jeep putts along I-5.

Now, this is not a recent quickie-type of an affair.

Oh, no.

Audiobooks and I are childhood sweethearts!

As a kid, I first learned how to read by looking at the words in the book residing in my hands while listening to gentle voices on tapes-

Yes, tapes. I am dating myself a bit here…

-narrate the story I was currently viewing. Who doesn’t remember their teacher reading a famous story during a quiet hour of the school day?

I recall very long road trips along the West Coast-

Round-trip “family” vacations to Vegas and back via a purple egg-shaped vehicle we called the “Grape Van,” alluding to the Motown hit, “Grape Vine.”

My family has a history of naming its vehicles, remember?

-listening to old timey radios shows-

We’re talking OLD! With the shaky voices, overacting, sound effects and eardrum-blistering organ music…

-such as Sherlock Holmes stories and The Shadow mystery stories, all of which sent chills up my spine as easily as reading it with my own eyes would have done. Maybe even more so because I was hearing an actual human voice to the image I had in my head.

When my father was alive, he and Pilot’s parents would often share stories about their childhoods. Pilot’s mother, known to you as Honey, and my parents shared very similar childhood experiences. Both grew up in small rural towns with barely two nickels to rub together. One of their fondest childhood memories was listening to the radio. The shows I listened to on audiotape in the car on the way to Viva Las Vegas, were probably the same shows they listened to live on the air.

Not that I want to label our parents as old or anything… Nah, I’d never do that.

<cough> They’re in their 60’s… <cough>

If you want get political and look at the humanitarian side of the issue: audio books are great for people who enjoy storytelling but may have difficulty with reading. For example: someone with dyslexia.

One of my favorite blogs to frequent, the author, Vicky shares that audiobooks aren’t her favorite thing. At first she was completely against them, but now they’re “OK.” Personally, I’ve always been a huge fan and highly recommend audio books to anyone!

So, what about you Precious Readers?

Do you have a preference? Is it strictly hard copy books for you or strictly audio books? Is there room in your heart for both?

Also, I would love your opinion on Dragon speech software. This is only my first blog post using the program. Although it’s a little awkward right now, I think I can beat this learing curve and am enjoying it. I think with some practice this will become much easier and position itself as a necessary tool for my writing.

To toot my own horn a little bit: I must admit my typing is almost as fast as this Dragon speech software-

A sort of “thank you” to my parents for slapping me in front of Mavis Beacon for an entire summer one year?  …  I guess…?

-but this program is allowing me to save hands for my job in my Daily Life until I’m writing full-time and dreaming up new stories (and even more future blog posts) for you!

Those of you out in the blogosphere, please share your experiences-

The good, bad and wickedly ugly…

-with Dragon speech software. I would love to hear some reviews, tips and tricks, plus any other tidbits that might be rolling around in your noggin. Inquiring minds want to know!

Well thanks for reading, Precious Readers! Tune in next time to radio Katie brought to you by Dragon speech software version 11.

Honey is back and life is sweet!

“Happy girls are the prettiest.”
– Audrey Hepburn

Thank you all so much for your prayers and thoughts. My mother-in-law, Honey was able to go home with Silver Fox, and is now back to her sparkly nail ways!

Of course, this means I’m going to be completely on her ass about her health, even more so than before.

Let me tell you, Precious Readers, I may be out of shape, but I focus a lot of my attention to eating as healthy as possible. A job in data entry in my Daily Life for 9+ hours a day wreaks havoc on my own ass, and I’m about to kick Pilot and my own to get us up and moving.

It’s been a while since I did any book reviews or spoken about some of my favorite authors. It might shock you to learn, I haven’t read much lately. Life has been so hectic with work, I’ve spent more time with my eyes on the boob tube, rather than my nose in a book.

There’s a new post brewing in my brain that will need more time to come into fruition, and I’m excited to explore the topic with you. However, for now I think I’ll just leave you in suspense until next time.

Horrible of me, I know.

This weekend, I’m attending a concert with some gal pals. The band Ivan and Alyosha is an amazing band that started here in Washington. One of the band members is a former high-school classmate of mine, and a bunch of my “past” pals are joining me, one of which is Obi-One-Pin-Obi.  The other two, I believe I’ll introduce to you as Glamazon and Tenderheart.

Glam is someone I’ve known almost as long as Obi. Even though the three of us were in school at the same time together, Glam and I became friends a little bit later in life.

I like to call Glam the more “Authentic Asian” between the two of us. Her family actually moved here from South Korea, while she was born in the good ol’ US of A. She and her family actually go back to South Korea on a fairly regular basis.

Well, as much as international travel can be considered “regular,” I suppose.

Don’t let the name fool you. Glam is humble, fun and super spunky, but if you don’t watch out, she’ll get you with a zinger faster than my dad used to joke about “saber-toothed crotch crickets.”

I picked the name Glamazon (but for the most part, we’ll refer to her as Glam) because she is super fashionable and always in the know of what’s trendy. Might have to do with her job.  She actually works for a major company in Seattle. I won’t post the actual name of the company, but let’s just say it rhymes with her nickname.

Tenderheart is someone I met at CWU. I don’t quite remember how we met, but I’m sure she remembers. She had a few years in college on me, as she had difficulty deciding the right path for herself. Now she’s an ultrasound operator and living the exciting life of the medical field. The oldest of six kids, she’s responsible, considerate and completely selfless with everything she does. The fact that Tenderheart ended up in the medical field doesn’t really surprise me.

I’m excited to see the concert this weekend and hang out with my gal pals. It was touch-and-go for a while with Honey in the hospital before. Let me just say, Pilot, Silver Fox, Joker, Hoops and all the rest are exuding a relief I can sense for miles.

If you want to try to find me, I’ll be at Showbox at the Market tomorrow for their 8pm concert.

Ooh! I like this! It’s a little like “Where’s Waldo?” but without the horrible, unflattering stripes!

Tickets are still available! They’re only $20 bucks!

Which is great for a broke-ass like me!

*Katherine Bacher’s comments regarding Ivan and Alyosha were not endorsed by Ivan and Alyosha. All comments are strictly the opinion of Katherine Bacher.

just call me Supernurse, i guess?

Time heals all wounds… Apparently. I have yet to see that.

Well Precious Readers, I recognize it has been almost a month since my last blog post. You may notice this post looks odd compared to my typical formatting. This is because today’s post is brought to you via the hospital.

Here’s the sitch:

Earlier this month I was dealing with a sprained wrist, and now carpal tunnel issues from a vast increase of work in my Daily Life. I’ve increased acupuncture appointments and have had my right wrist wrapped and been icing at night up until about last week. Even now, this typing pains me, but didn’t want to leave my blogosphere peeps hanging.

Separately, as of yesterday, my mother in law, known to you as Honey, has been in the hospital due to chest pains. Although the docs aren’t quite sure what’s going on, she’s been alert, laughing and able to be up, sharing in conversations with us. She was transferred to a hospital about 15 minutes away from Pilot and I, so we’ve been able to visit her the most.

Mostly, Pilot and I are trying to make sure my father in law, Silver Fox, eats and stays hydrated. He and Honey spend so much time taking care of other people, you can imagine it’s extremely difficult to have anyone try to take care of them for a change.

However, things have been on a good note. Throughout this time, I find myself lucky to have a mother who cares so deeply about other people, always wanting good health and fun for others. She calls Honey a couple of times a day and has been very supportive during this time. I know it is tough for my mom to hear about someone in the hospital due to chest pains after losing my own father to a heart attack.

Pilot’s parents, Honey and Silver Fox, are easily one of the funniest couples I have had the honor to meet. They’ve been joking and laughing. Wishing it hadn’t happened this way, I hope that they both take this as an opportunity to think about their lives and try to live healthier. Now, I’m no spring chick. I have a spare tire, and wish I was talking about the car. However, I have normal blood pressure, cholesterol levels and can easily climb 3 staircases without getting winded. Now, that’s never here nor there, but either way, it’s tough to watch a loved one carried off to the hospital, especially for something that might have been preventable. I’ve been there more times than I would have liked due to car accidents, appendicitis, heart attacks, shattered ankles, colon cancer, etc. Is it weird that I’ve had to call 911 for almost all the people I love at one time or another?

Today, as Pilot and I were wandering the halls, hand-in-hand we moved in comfortable silence. Then, I had to jerk him around the corner, practically pulling his arm out of his socket so we wouldn’t miss the corner for the elevator. When he nearly avoided walking into the wall, he asked me how I knew where everything was. Pilot and I have only been in is hospital twice. Yesterday and today. After pondering this question for a few minutes, I answered, “I guess I just know my way around hospitals.”

My mother and I have both, separately, worked for a couple of hospitals over the years, and I’ve either spent my own time at doctor’s offices for myself, or visiting family/friends so many times in my life that hospitals have become old hat for me. Oddly enough, I’m sometimes more comfortable in hospitals than my own home. There’s a sense of routine and stability. Cafeterias are always either on the same floor as sky bridges, or they’re on the ground level. Labs and X-Rays are always near one of the main entrances. The gift shops are always going to be filled with more tchotchkes that you didn’t realize you couldn’t live without than an airport terminal.

Totally weird. I know.

One of my Sis-In-Laws, Hoops, has reached a new level of understanding with me. She was at the house as the ambulance was starting to drive off. Never wishing that feeling on anyone, I felt her pain as she shared her experience of approaching her parent’s home and having Silver Fox explain that Honey was on the way to the hospital. I don’t wish that feeling on anyone. It’s an impotent, hollow, empty and helpless feeling which can make one erratic, scared, and sometimes even hostile. I don’t even think those are the best words to describe it.

I don’t think there are words to describe it.

Pilot has told me-

Unfortunately on more than one occasion…

-that if an emergency ever happened he wants me around. Not in an, “I love you, you’re my wife,” sense or even a, “You keep me company,” ideal.

Nope, Precious Readers, it’s 100% pure, “I’m helpless in an emergency and you’ll make sure I don’t die” scenario. I don’t know what it is, but when emergencies happen, I turn into Supernurse, the Emergency Robot. I am able to recall from memory finite details about a person’s health, medications, symptoms, past history, allergies to medication and foods, and environmental/physical care treatment preferences. No matter how many years it’s been.

I spring into action from CPR/First Aid training and no longer act as the babbling, stuttering idiot I tend to be during my Daily/Real Life. Instead, I am articulate, concise and a parrot of important situational/emotional/physical details.

Why didn’t I become a nurse? Actually I have no idea. Probably because I only took one biology class in high school and got a C+ in chemistry. Also, I don’t want my everyday job to deal with life/death situations. Trust me, I see enough medical action across the board due to family and friends alone. I don’t need it everyday. I’d probably crack.

In one of my earliest posts, I dedicated it to my friends who were in various medical fields. They’re amazing people who I have the utmost respect for. They have to play assistant, concierge, friend, psychologist, temporary family member for some, and still be your healthcare professional all in one.

Or, these people are also known as parents, if you’d like to go down that route.

No real point to this story either, just glad to be writing to the masses once again. Maybe just a couple of messages for you:

3. Never be afraid to lighten the mood if necessary. That can be one of the best stress relievers that is in your control.

2. Be kind to your healthcare professionals. Don’t be afraid to speak up and take an active role in your health, but they are in that profession for a reason: they care about human life, which means they care about you. Just like some family, they may just not know how to show it.

Most importantly:

1. You need to remember to take time out for your own health. You can’t take care of others if you don’t take care of yourself.

This includes a certain writer whose wrists are feeling on fire right about now. Pilot, if you’re reading this, bring on the ice pack!

Prayers for Homey and Pilot’s family right now are appreciated. Peace, Precious Readers!

Bacher=Out!

fighting the winter blues

“ ‘Tis healthy to be sick sometimes.”
– Henry David Thoreau

“Bullshit.”
– Katherine Bacher

Precious Readers, you have been gypped. I have had difficulty figuring out what to post due to one reason, and one reason only.

I have been lazy.

My Daily Life has become a horrible gob of work, illness and stuffed sinuses. Not that it’s an excuse.  You have a right to know, that when I become sick, I become a complete and total hermit.

I don’t do anything. I don’t speak to anyone. I don’t like to have sunlight in my dark, dank cavernous apartment.  The sick days basically sum up to me sitting in a chair or curled up in bed with my iPad or remote cortrol, losing myself to whatever happens to be on the screen and block out the world.

Surely my office is none too happy with me right now. It’s the beginning of a new year, and I’ve already called in sick 3 times this January. My haughtiness about not catching the cold/flu going around my office has been in vain. Karma has bitch slapped me harder than a pimp smacks with the face of his watch.

Separately, I find myself extremely down in morale lately. Times are tough, my job is hard, the commute is seizure-inducing and my brain is slowly breaking down into a pile of winter-blues-goo.

However, my recluse has not entirely been in vain. More inspiration for my writing has ventured through my snot-filled head, and the words of my characters have floated through my clogged ear canals. Also, to keep myself occupied during Seattle’s hibernation season: I have re-picked up crocheting to pass the time.

Although the two hats attempted have not been large enough to fit my Charlie-Brown-pumpkin-sized head, the first will work for my baby niece, and the second one will fit my baby niece when she is in elementary school.

If this pattern keeps up, I’ll have made a hat large enough for my anvil-sized skull by hat attempt #5.

So, my apologies, Precious Readers that this post is not entirely inspirational, nor filed with lessons learned. It is merely the musings of a tea-and-Day-Quil-monitored brain desperate to make sure some form of a post is sent out into the blogosphere.

How do you beat the winter blues?

What are your best cold/flu remedies?

What steps do you take for keeping motivated and inspired?

excuse me, while i kiss the sky

You want me to what?!

Never mind the fact that I’m adopted and took my first commercial flight when I was six months old, or that I’ve been on several (easily almost 10 commercial flights) in my lifetime. Precious Readers, I should warn you that I am not a great flier and do not crave leaving the earth. If anything, I prefer going deeper via lakes, oceans, rivers, etc. I’m more of a water/land-type of person.

If this is the first time you’re joining us on this blog, you may not know that I call my husband “Pilot.” The reason being: he flies airplanes.

Kind of anticlimactic, right?

The part I haven’t always shared is that he has also flown aerobatics. That’s when the planes fly in loops, upside-down, flips, etc.

That’s a little more eye-catching, isn’t it?

Today’s post will be recalling my very first Cessna flight with Pilot.

During the early days of dating with Pilot, probably about 3-6 months in, (I’m sure Pilot has the date, since all pilots keep a log book), he decided to take me on a flight in a Cessna. I told him I wasn’t a great flier.

Me: I hate flying.

Pilot: Don’t worry; I’ll be right there with you.

Me: It scares me shitless.

Pilot: Nah, you’ll be fine.

Me: <beginning to hyperventilate.> I’m already freaking out, and we haven’t left the ground yet!

Pilot: <waves hand in vague gesture.> You’re going to love it!

Me: <frowns.> O-kaaay.

The night before our takeoff, we visited Pilot’s parents. His dad, Silver Fox-

Again, I did not come up with this nickname. The people in his office dubbed him with this particular title.

-decided to let me in on a little secret that was deemed necessary before leaving.

Silver Fox: Now, Katie, just remember one thing.

Me: <turns to face Silver Fox, and shrugs.> Ok.

Silver Fox: <holds up his index finger and thumb slightly apart from each other.> There is only 1/4 inch of metal separating you and 5,000 feet.

Me: <pales in color, sets lips in grim line.> Great. Thanks, Silver Fox. Really needed that.

Everyone in the room except me: <laughing hysterically.>

Night passes and the crushing weight of my impending doom approaches. My parents and some family friends joined us to see me off. Mostly teasing me about how it was going to be.

Needless to say, before takeoff, I asked several millions of questions-

Shaky voice not withstanding

-and was white knuckled during the experience.

Now, I don’t know if you’ve ever been in a smaller airplane, but it is cozy.

When I say cozy, I’m talking about, you’re practically sitting in the lap of the hot guy next to you, which you can imagine an 18-year-old virgin who is finally participating in her first dates finds those close quarters a very intimate experience as it is.

Never mind adding the stress of trying to appear calm, cool, sexy, feminine and pretty while trying fight the (ironically named) “flight” sensation of facing one’s biggest fear… AND feeling that if I continue flying in this sardine-can-of-a-monstrosity-tempting-fate-by-defying-gravity that I might surely perish – avoiding the sensation to jump out of said moving (and airborne) plane which would GUARANTEE my death 100%.

If you’ve ever flown in a large airplane, once in a while you might feel the plane dip slightly due to turbulence.

Well, Precious Readers, Allow me to explain:

In a smaller plane, such as a Cessna, YOU FEEL EVERYYTHING AND YOU THINK YOU ARE GOING TO DIE.

Most people would say I was overreacting with the previous statement. And it’s probably true.

IF YOU ARE NOT AFRAID OF FLYING.

So how did this experience end?

Did I keep my composure?

Did I find a previously unknown passion for flying?

Did I have an ethereal experience by suddenly recognizing I was in the heavens and just a little bit physically closer to God and find my bliss?

Well…

About half an hour into the flight I began feeling airsick and dizzy, causing a quick turnaround and emergency landing, with which upon said landing, I immediately locked myself inside the women’s restroom praying for the nausea to wear off.

Which it did.

20 minutes later.

It’s a tale as old as time: Girl meets amazing, hot and talented guy. Guy asks girl to go flying into the sunset together. Girl nearly tosses her cookies in front of amazing, hot and talented guy.

I know, right? Every female’s dream.

Now, it’s safe to say that Pilot probably wasn’t expecting such an extreme reaction. He probably chalked it up to general nerves for anyone flying in a small plane for the first time.

Well, he met his match with me. I don’t think the idea of a nearly-vomiting-and-potentially-passing-out-seatmate being on his list of experiences.

Once I recovered, having (thankfully) NOT actually getting sick, I splashed some cool water on my face, washed my hands and exited the restroom, wondering to myself if Pilot was even going to look me in the eye, or if he could even face me.

Pilot stood there with a sheepish grin on his face and a small 7Up.

Aww.

Me: <takes 7Up.>

Pilot: Sip that, slowly.

Me: <mumbles something similar sounding to a ‘thank you’.>

Pilot: <gestures to couch in lounge of airport.>

Me: <sits tentatively.>

Pilot: How are you feeling?

Me: <sipping gently on 7Up.> Better.

Pilot: So… Flying. Not your favorite thing?

Me: <blushes… or would if color had returned to face yet.> <shakes head.> Nope, sorry. <raises eyebrow, and gives watery smile.> Um, did the phrase, “I hate flying. It scares me shitless” ring any bells?

Pilot: <laughs gently.> Oh, yeah.  <pauses.> You really weren’t kidding were you?

Me: <panic sets in.>

Oh God! Oh God! I ruined this! He’s going to dump me, isn’t he? He probably wants some blonde-painted-up-flight-attendant-who-weighs-88-lbs-with-contotionist-yoga-instructor-moves with whom he can fly around the world!

That’s it! I’m done for! He’s so cute; I’m never going to meet another guy as hot as this one! Why, oh WHY did I let him talk me into flying?!

DAMN MY EQUILIBRIUM!!!

Me: <shrugs and laughs lightly as if it ‘ain’t no thang.’> Well, what you see, and hear, is what you get.

Pilot: Good. I like girls who don’t play games.

Me: <balks in surprise.>

Pilot: <tucks a strand of loose hair behind my ear.> Well, I’ll just have to take that into consideration the next time we go up.

Me: <whatever color had returned pales again.>

Pilot: <laughs.> Don’t worry, we’ll go when you’re ready.

It may not surprise you, that his response had surprised me. Granted, I was (very) new to dating, but I was pretty sure a girl puking on one of her first dates with a guy did not have an equivalent to “when’s our next date?”

So what did we learn here today, Precious Readers?

I learned that there really are nice guys out there, even the ridiculously hot ones, and Pilot learned to take what I say at face value. What I say may not always be pretty, but he’ll never have any guesswork.

What has been one of your most embarrassing moments while on a date? Or, what is the worst thing that ever happened to you while on a date? Share your stories and comments here!

Believe me, from the story above you’ll receive no judgment from me!

it has a name for a reason. let’s keep it that way, m’kay?

Warning:
Below is a rant I cannot keep to myself anymore.
If you’d prefer to skip straight to the cookie recipe, please feel free to do so.

Now Precious Readers, I really hope after this post we remain friends. However, I do have an extremely serious pet peeve that must be shared.

There’s a reason it’s called “Christmas” and not “the Holiday Season.”

I know, I know. There are those who celebrate Chanukah, and Kwanza. Which is fine, I have no problems wishing someone a Happy Chanukah or Happy Kwanza. It’s those who celebrate nothing and have to make a big fuss about it that bother me.

In my place of work during my Daily Life, there are very few people who are Christians. Again, which is fine. I’m not going to shove “You should believe in Christianity” down someone’s throat. I, myself, did not become a Christian until I was 16 years old.

The problem I have is with people who are extreme to point out there is nothing. You know what? I say, let those who believe in a higher power, do so in peace. I don’t go around shoving Christianity down your throats, so please don’t Bi

If I’m wrong, or other religions, faiths, spiritualities are incorrect and there is absolutely no afterlife, reincarnation, or dispersion through the universe, then… What?  Nothing will happen when we die?

So what’s the big deal?

If we’re wrong, we’re wrong. There won’t be anything to change it and we’re all dust in the ground. Don’t go shoving your non-belief down my throat.  Honestly, what’s the harm? If it makes people act morally and humanely towards others and our environment, how is tis a bad thing? Yes, there are people who choose to use their faith as a method of hate-

which I 100% disagree with

-but 95% of believers in something tend to be more along the lines of peace towards her/his fellow man. Real Christianity specifically is of the belief that God is a God of LOVE and loves everyone, and we should treat others with love, no matter their background, sexual preference, previous sins, etc.

Now, I am definitely not saying I’m perfect.

Far from it, as you may have read in earlier posts.

I am the last person who would say I was a good person, a moral person or least of all a perfect person. However, I make choices every moment of every day to try and do my best to help others.

However, one thing I will not stand, are those who shove the idea that there is no afterlife, reincarnation, dispersion into the universe, or whatever, only to then turn around and tell me about their “Christmas” plans. Non-believers of anything should not be celebrating “Christmas.” This pet peeve irritates me to no bounds.

They should be celebrating: Winter. Or Winter Vacation. Or Snowfall. Or that crappy holiday, Seinfeld talks about: Festivus.

Christmas is a holiday specifically focused on the birth of our Savior, Jesus Christ.

This is so important, I will repeat myself:

Christmas is a holiday specifically focused on the birth of our Savior, Jesus Christ.

No, according to the Jewish calendar, Dec. 25th is not His actual birthday, but it is the day our country recognizes as His birthday.

I wish I did not have listen to others who do not believe in Christianity use the term so casually to define their Winter Vacation plans. There is a reason it’s called CHRISTmas, and not ATHIEST-mas. Now, Jewish, Agnostics, Buddhists, etc., at least you believe in something to celebrate during the winter season, so please go and celebrate the Winter Solstice, Chanukah, Kwanza, etc. in peace. At least you are recognizing something and calling it by its seasonal name appropriately.

For those who do not believe in anything, please leave me to celebrate CHRISTmas on my own in peace, while you celebrate your Winter Vacation.

Katie’s “Christmas Rant” – out.

To perk up this blog a wee bit, since it’s a rough way to end the Christmas Season, I am sharing a Cranberry Pecan Biscotti recipe with you. Alas, it is not my own personal recipe, I found it through a co-worker. However, since Pilot and I are wickedly poor, I tend to make Christmas Cookies each year for my family. This year I tried biscotti and they were a huge hit. I have some tips below, along with a fun article that was written about biscotti.

Enjoy!

Pecan Cranberry Biscotti

Makes approximately 24 logs, or rounds

INGREDIENTS:

½ C. pecan halves, toasted (other nuts can be substituted)

1 tsp. baking powder

2 ½ C. flour

1 ¼ C. sugar

1/8 tsp. salt

3 large eggs

2 large egg yolk

1 tsp. pure vanilla extract

1 C. dried cranberries

Zest of 1 lemon and/or orange

1.  Heat oven 350°.  Toast pecans in oven.  After cooled, finely chop half the pecans, and leave remaining ones in halves; set aside.

2.  In an electric mixer fitted with the paddle attachment, combine baking powder, flour, sugar, and salt. In a bowl, beat eggs, yolks, and vanilla. Add to dry ingredients; mix on medium low until sticky dough is formed. Add in pecans, cranberries, and zest.

3.  Turn dough out onto well-floured board; sprinkle with flour, and knead slightly. Shape into 9-by-3 1/2-inch logs. Transfer to prepared baking sheet. Bake until golden brown, 25 to 30 minutes. Reduce oven to 275°.

4.  Let cool enough to handle, about 10 minutes. On a cutting board, you can choose to:

a.  Cut logs on diagonal into 1/2-inch-thick slices; or

b.  Cut logs into small,1/2 inch thick rounds

Then, place flat on baking sheet; place in oven 20 minutes each side. Cool completely and place in air tight container.

Some tips:

A reminder to allow yourself plenty of time. This is a slow-baked cookie, and will need to be baked TWICE. Once for the original dough logs, and a second time to crisp up the cut sides.

For my biscotti, I only used orange zest and a little orange juice to add to the flavor of the dough.

Before kneading dough, flour your working area and your hands thoroughly. It’s a very sticky dough.  If it’s crumbly, persevere and keep working it. If it’s absolutely too dry, add a little bit of water and work the dough thoroughly before deciding to add more. IT’s supposed to be a drier dough.

When cutting the dough, I highly recommend a bread knife. If you do not own a bread knife, a serrated blade is the next best thing.

Check out this great article from Susan Russo, featured from NPR. It has some great additional tips and a little bit of history about biscotti.

Final Season’s Greetings before the New Year approaches!

Holy cow, the New Year is approaching quickly!

What are your favorite Christmas (or Chanukah, Kwanza, etc.) recipes? Please share!